Instead of ideas such as the bill proposed by Florida Senator Gary Siplin, who suggested making droopy pants illegal, I have a much simpler idea: peer pressure.
| Blue | 1st Period | Gray | White | 2nd Period |
| 3rd Period | Polka Dots | Nike | 4th Period | Cartoon |
| “Mom” | Girlfriend’s name | Lunch | Toy | Stripes |
| Nondescript color |
5th Period | Sports team |
Pink! | Any URL |
| 6th Period | Warning | 7th Period | Office referral |
Detention |
For those who need to justify this with jargon, try “I am using negative-reinforcement shaping with advanced face-to-face social networking combined with vicarious spasmodic recognition signals and aural-mode synaptic connections.” That is, maybe listening to the laughter following a “bingo!” call will… er… drop the incidence rate a bit.
Figuring out which box is for underwear color (or decoration), which for the time of incident, and which is for the consequence is up to the reader.