Join the Digital Inhumanities

Over the past decade, the renewed connections between digital manipulation and traditional humanities has led to a renaissance in the quantification of the unquantifiable, the digitization of the uncountable, and the encoding of the ineffable. It is high time that we encapsulate this academic movement in a term that will be broadly recognizable, attractive to academic administrators, and above all fundable by public agencies and private philanthropies. I term this future new movement Digital Inhumanities.

Digital Inhumanities is the interdisciplinary field where we apply a classical Procrustean Bed to whatever is your research focus. If you study the intangible qualities of human existence and expression, we will quantify it until it bears no resemblance to your experiences and understandings. If you study the quantifiable, we will apply post-postmodern transtheoretical differangiogenetic jargon to obfuscatarize your prestructural constructs, Sokalizing the quantifiable into a paramutual hegemoniasis.

Examples of Digital Inhumanities (or “DI”) projects include the following:

  • The Hermeneutical SAS™
  • Pixelating Wittgenstein
  • Social Network Analysis of verbs in The Furies
  • Hyperactivecities
  • Valley of the Shadow of Interminable Civil War Primary Sources

These examples of individual projects would not be possible without Inhumanities Centers geared to the digital age. A network of Inhumanities Centers focuses the energy of digital inhumanities projects. My current favorite is THE MATRIX, an upper-Midwestern organization that putatively connect humanists but in reality, according to associate director Ether I. Zwatallucan, functions as a giant simulator of alternative cultures to pacify human bodies while their servers use humans’ energy to maintain sentience, write YA genre novels, and attend academic conferences in the Caribbean.

Digital Inhumanities is a movement whose time has come, and I, for one, welcome our new parathought-leader overlords.